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A new study claims that 33 is the age at which true happiness kicks in. (It neglects to mention how long that blissful state is sustained.) I read the story and said meh. Like most research, it's far from airtight. Did they survey any 5 year olds eating ice cream? Did they ask the three folks who just split that $656 million jackpot? I bet there's a lot of happiness there! How about some really old guy who was just asked out by a Laker girl? Donald Trump fresh from the hairstylist? You see, timing is everything. What's in a number anyway? Don't we all know sourpusses who walk around in a snit because their Rolls got a scratch? As my husband says, "the only thing to get upset over is a bad biopsy." Why 33? The study says that age 33 "is enough time to have shaken off childhood na�vety and the wild scheming of teen-aged years without losing the energy and enthusiasm of youth." Wild scheming of teenagers? I beg to differ. I used to attend the US Open and stare at middle aged women sitting in the stands with their racquets in their laps, as if they expected to replace Monica Seles if she turned an ankle. Or was stabbed. There's a neighborhood karaoke joint where wannabe Peabo Brysons sustain aneurysm inducing notes so long and intensely, the DJ has 911 on speed dial. No, folks, wild scheming knows no chronological boundaries. And what of 33? It's an interesting number. Jesus was crucified at 33. Pope Paul I was pope for only 33 days. It's the numerical equivalent of AMEN - 1+13+5+14+. It was Larry Bird's number. It's a palindrome, kinda. There are a bunch of mathematical factoids about 33, which are too boring to mention (or comprehend.) Numerologists claim it's a master number (whatever that is) like 11 and 22. The Freemasons have 33 degrees. But the most significant meaning of the number 33, for any kid who attended college in the northeast, is its appearance on Rolling Rock beer - a dietary staple in the region. No one can say for sure why the 33 is stamped on every bottle - putting it right up there with the Trinity in terms of mystery. Regarding happiness, I tend to side with Abe Lincoln, who said, "People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be." As soon as I turn 33, I'll let you know if I feel any happier.