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"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." Psalm 139:13-14 (ESV) The silence. The rejection. The harsh words. The absence of intimacy. The questions. The lack of answers. The hurt. My heart aches for anyone in a marriage that's struggling. I've been there. Many of us have. But I think the deepest hurt comes when one spouse resigns while the other is still trying. There is a panic that arises to somehow make the other person wake up, stop their resignation, and help you fix this relationship. A situation like this is much more complicated than simple answers I could offer here. But might I give you one stepping stone upon which to stand, to stop the panic and balance yourself? Decide today that you are worthy. Because you are. Worthy. You may not feel like it. But a quick glimpse at Psalm 139 assures me, you are. And I'd rather depend on the solid truth of God than the roller coaster of fickle feelings. You are beautiful and captivating and attractive and smart and capable. But if you are in a relationship full of unmet expectations, unresolved issues, and frustrating communication, I suspect you feel a little less than all I've described. Broken down relationships can really break down a woman. And if you're anything like me, when you feel broken down those around you get your worst. Then upon all the hurt and anxiety you layer on regret, shame, and the feeling that you've lost yourself. You've lost that girl inside you that used to be so positive and happy and ready to take on the world. Can I whisper a tender truth to you? The only way to recapture her is to come up for air and remember you are worthy. Then you can act worthy. And step aside from the emotional yuck to make some level headed decisions. Get a plan. Talk to wise people who love you and will walk this tough journey with you. Draw some boundaries with your husband, if there are some needed. Pray like crazy for clear discernment. And read good books that will help you. I just read Dr. Tim Clinton's new book called, Breakthrough. In it he says, "By discovering God's definition of true love and learning to live by it, we can open the door to freedom. Our future is in God's hands. When you are able to see and embrace this truth � there's your breakthrough!" Remember you can't control how he acts and reacts, but you can control how you act and react. Reclaim who you are.